My Survival Guide To The Big Move Home

So more and more 20 and 30 somethings are moving home with their parents. Obviously we have done the same and although the financial rewards are enormous you would have to be totally blind to not realise that it wont all be smooth sailing.

In order to survive this challenging step I have created my top ten rules for surviving the big move home....

1) Daddy’s little Girl
Rule number one is an easy one … and at the same time the hardest one ever. You will always be mum and dads little girl. They will want you to call when you get there to make sure your ok, they will pop their head in to say good night on their way to bed and if you have a bad day they will want to make you feel better buy stuffing you full of your “favorite foods’ and copious amounts of conversation.

2) Boundaries is a dirty word
Be aware there are no such things as boundaries…. You don’t have any privacy when you move home no matter how well intended your family are. They will raid your room to check if you have any clothes to add to the washing, your sister will still “borrow” your favorite top and then leave it in a crumpled heap in the corner of their room for weeks on end until you desperately need to wear it, They will ransack your personal space trying to find that DVD you were watching last week. Bare in mind, none of this is done in order to snoop into your personal belongings its just the way family is, there are no boundaries.

3) Feign Ignorance
My biggest piece of advice is to feign total ignorance on anything even slightly technical or electrical. You know absolutely nothing about ipods / computers / tv’s. Failure to do so will result in you becoming in-house technical support. This is a draining, annoying occupation where you get endless calls at weird times asking how to change the foxtel channel or why your sat nav is telling you to turn left in the kitchen.

4) The Keep Button
Always press the “keep” button on any of your saved foxtel channels. Parents and other family members have this unbelievable ability to only delete the programs you really want to watch, despite your repeated explanations on not pressing that particular button.

5) Your New Lifestyle Coordinator
Moving home means your automatically expected to attend all big family events, you no longer get a say on whether you are busy that particular Saturday, its just like being that painful teenager dragged to Auntie Mildred’s BBQ and getting asked all sorts of awkward questions about boyfriends and kids.

6) Menopause IS an Ugly Word….
By the time adults return home most mothers will have started to go through the change of life…. Hot sweats, mood swings, discussions on how different they feel are all fairly normal and the trick to surviving this time where usually your dad would be taking the full brunt of this is to nod and smile where appropriate and never ever make them feel like the emotional, unreasonable person they really are. Just remember, there is a very good likelihood either you or your partner will go through this eventually so this is all just good practice.

7) Money Matters
There are many reasons to move back home but one of the main reoccurring themes I keep coming across is money. Either you are trying to save for something or whether you don’t have enough to do anything else, it all seems to revolve around money. Therefore it seems parents feel it their right to have a say on your monetary lifestyle. Whether the polite … “Do you really need that” comment to a new pair of shoes or an enforced budget because they know better be aware this is another area of your privacy that is on its way down the toilet. Now you not only have to justify your spending habits to your partner, bank and self, parents feel they have every right to suggest ways to “better” finances.

8) Staying the Golden Child
Doing something small and helpful occasionally without being asked makes your life a lot easier – it's a mental thing, they think you're being helpful so won't ask you to do anything else that will certainly be bigger and more cumbersome. Attack is definitely the best form of defense on this one!

9) Retreat
When tired and grumpy, retreat. I personally love a bit of confrontation when I'm grumpy. However, it is advisable not to use your live-in parents as your steam valve. They don't appreciate it; and then you get the "I'm just very disappointed in you" chat – hideous.

10) Grateful but never again
Finally, realize that you are not ungrateful or a horrible child because you find it hard to slot back into the life you had 10 years ago…. You are a grown up now and if you didn’t find yourself longing for your own space I would be even more worried. Moving home, trying to fit back into someone elses house rules and lifestyle is hard and even though im sure you are not only grateful but indebted to your parents in their selfless act of goodwill I can guarantee it wont be easy…. And unless you are desperate you wont be doing it again any time soon so enjoy it while you can!

Sleeping Special

So my last house had a 4 poster bed and I have to say, climbing into it at night felt kinda special. Ohhh, I know silly and childish but the mattress sat really high off the ground which gave a whole new meaning to "Climb into bed" I really did have to stand on my tippy toes and climb.

So obviously I'm going somewhere with this, I love the idea of a bed that is the centre of a room, that is special and makes you feel like climbing in is the best thing you have done all day.

However my bed in the new house wont be a four poster and up until now i wasn't sure how to make it feel special.

The way this bulkhead follows the wall and then up onto the roof defines the space beautifully without being overwhelming.

Such a good idea, so clever and yet fairly simple. I'm not sure if it will be too much for our space but still - I cant help but want to give it a try.

Progress

Today is short and sweet - well particularly sweet for me, I have progress to show you on the house.

The upstairs slab is complete and I have to say, its actually a very interesting space, there are interesting corners and bit and pieces and I am really happy with how its coming along. Obviously I now cant wait till I have upstairs walls but I'm still happy with it as is.

Also, finally having a roof downstairs has totally changed the feeling of the spaces. They actually feel like rooms and I cant wait to get my hands on them and turn them into a home....

Just Dont Get It

Ok - so maybe I'm out of touch with what is "in" but have you noticed these little stickers on the SUV's driving around town lately.

It seems to be the latest "in thing" for car bling..... ha.

So my question is, does the rest of the world really need to know you have the perfect mum, dad, two kids and a dog family.... would it be sad if I put me and hubby and a dog? Don't get me wrong I feel they are terribly cute and just a little bit kitch but would I do it ... perhaps not.

It feels to me your just giving people you don't know ... people who don't know you, more information about you than they need, its that facebook privacy thing again.... what is too much information?

Do you remember the ad where the guy filling up his car at a petrol station desperately tries to hide the baby seats from the cute woman filling up next to him.... how much harder would that be with the little people waving happily on his back window.

Saying that, driving to work today I found the funniest one ever... it must have been tongue in cheek - it was a brand new ute clubsport - very hotted up (if that's the term to use) with the shiny wheel thingy's and a big brumm brumm muffler - and on his back window was a guy with a surf board and a dog ... very funny.

More Inspiration Boards

So I had a fair bit of fun yesterday with my theatre board.... it was lovely to finally put into words / pictures exactly what I have been thinking ...

And I'm also pretty sure of what I want in regards to my master bedroom, in my head, these two rooms are the most complete.

Obviously - you have all seen my adorable quilt cover, and then there is the maps ... total heaven. But some other things I have only just decided on are the bed, I would love a king sized leather bed... something really luxurious, I also like the idea of mirrored bedside tables and maybe even a set of mirrored draws.....

I also want a big comfy lounge chair which I can put on the wall next to the bath (Note that there is a big opening between the ensuite and master bedroom where the bath tub is meaning hubby can sit and chat to me after a long day at work.... my idea of heaven.

Finally I would love to find a really big mirror, in black that goes from the floor, I have been starting to source a few from local antique stores but nothing perfect just yet.

The lighting is simple but luxurious and the curtains will be heavy and dark, I am also going to have some lighter material behind so I can keep the light coming in but soften and add some privacy.

Overall I am happy with this room... I like where its going and I don't think its too pretty. Its still masculine enough to make darling hubby happy.

What do you think? Is there anything you would change?

Starting to Get Serious

So I'm now narrowing down my design ideas one room at a time ... I like the idea of having a set idea in my head on how I want the room to look early on so I can start thinking about how its all going to fit together.

The theatre is an easy one - for ages I have wanted to do a big black and white wall mural that pretty much takes up an entire wall and as I think I may have mentioned ages ago - after digging through the archives I found the best Sydney Harbour Bridge pictures ever - one of which I think I will use in this room.

I also knew I wanted dark warm colours which made me think of settling on a really dark navy blue and obviously all my trim including doors will be Antique white.

Because I had this idea in my head when Freedom brought out this amazing TV unit I just knew it would fit in perfectly with what I wanted....

So finally just the little details, I want a really thick comfy grey shag pile carpet and a lovely deep corner sofa, we are thinking of getting it made to fit however I think we will just see how the room looks before we make that decision.

Oh and if I can fit one of these lovely Ikea armchairs in ... somehow I would be in heaven but again, I think I'm going to have to just wait and see the space.

So there is a defiant feel to my room now - I know what I want it to look like, I know my colour scheme and now its just a matter of pulling it all together. I also know I'm going to need to add something to it to lighten it slightly, all the dark greys on dark blues could make this room just shallow but I'm hoping that by adding some light grey and white cushions it will just come alive beautifully.

What do you think ... first room is slowly getting there....

Out Door Havens

So again with this lovely cold weather I'm starting to think of out door havens. A place to take a nice steaming cup of coffee and just escape from it all .... don't know if any of these are very practical for good old hot and dry Oz however I think there kind of perfect....

Onwards and Upwards

Well finally I have some good news for you - Oh yes, I have another slab ... this one is just as exciting as the last so I thought I would give you photo overload ... so so happy - finally we are moving onwards and upwards.....

Has Friendship Become a Disposable Item?

So a bit of a double post today guys - this isn't a house related post but more of a philosophical question.

I have recently been hurt by a very very close friend, the relationship is over, not because if anything I have done, the simple fact is, I am happy and she cant bare to be around me anymore "apparently".

Before I continue let me say, I have plenty of friends, people to have coffee with and chat with and have a great deal of fun with but when I say best friend I mean that person who is almost as close to you as your mother or partner. The one that you just cant imagine living without.

Anyways, the after affects of this, I have to say, rival a break up and it hurts alot. It hurts that someone can throw years of friendship away over something so silly. The even sillier thing is that I don't want to get close to anyone again, I tell myself I'm perfectly happy on my own and I just don't know if I want to risk getting hurt again.

Its funny but I had this discussion with a group of married friends the other day and most of them said, if they ever lost their other half they probably wouldn't risk trying again, losing someone that close to you is always going to be hard but does this make us cold, does this make us hermits, are we now too afraid to get hurt we are not even going to take a risk?

I would love to say I'm brave enough to try, to say screw it... there are so many good memories of course its worth it! However now I'm on the other side of the fence, those good memories all feel tainted now, whenever I see a photo, or get reminded of something we did I just feel hurt and afraid and to be honest, I never want to risk it.... maybe its just for now, maybe it will get easier as time passes by and I relax my guard... you never know.

I wonder if this is a recent thing, I wonder if our expectations have become just to high, do we expect too much from others when we are not prepared to jump ourselves.... or perhaps friendship has just become another disposable item, replace it with something or someone else when it no longer suits?

Now that is a truly sad thought don't you think?

The Stairs Have It?

The entry is one of the biggest features in our house ... we have this lovely floating bridge, frameless glass balustrade and a gorgeous big door.... obviously we had very limited space and had to think outside the square but if space wasn't an object I probably would have done things slightly differently... I would have a big luxuriously wasted area when you walked in that just takes your breath away ... and obviously the best way to do that is the have a kick ass staircase.

These are a few of my favorites ....

Imagine Eating Breakfast Here

Ok so its probably that time of the year, usually I would be thinking about a nice break down south at our favorite holiday home... (we rent .... not own) with a big wood fire and lots of cards and red wine..... oh and breakfast on the terrace overlooking either the beach or the wineries.

So imagine my absolute despair when I saw this picture and thought.... aww im not going this year!

What do you think - I would almost give up a toe for a week at this place!

An Interesting Corner

If you read my blog even once every so often you will know that I'm pretty obsessed about my library, and I'm pretty excited about finally being able to design something permanent for my much loved books. So on the main wall of my landing is my floor to ceiling bookcases - which I have decided will be done in dark wood with pretty glass doors as per the pic below.



On the little wall to the side of the bookcases I want something interesting. A cool wall paper or an interesting mural perhaps.... I don't know but something that just adds to the space... these are my favorites at the moment. What do you think? Am I going too far?

Love Little Country Towns

On the weekend I had the pleasure of spending a night in the cutest little country town.... its the type of place where the pizza shop closes at 6pm, where everyone wants to stop and chat when you make a purchase and where you really don't need to worry about leaving your car parked on the main street.

One other thing I adore about little country towns is their second hand shops... I love second hand shops. I think last year I found this bronze Persian platter and this year I scored another little treasure....

Look at these, they sit about 20 cm high and bear the names of Bach and Beethoven... they also cost me a cool $15 each.... How wonderful are these little babies?

Parents Say the Darndest Things!

So this is funny - my mother received a Sat Nav for Christmas but has only just opened it this last week. Let me start by saying it makes her nervous ... she doesn't like it but has agreed to move with the times!

Anyways she has been using it for a week and last night when she got home she complained about how the little thing that sticks it to the windscreen keeps falling off.... Hubby told her to just stick it in the centre console to which my mother replied ...."How is it going to tell me where to go if it cant see out of the window".....

Hmm then we discussed how all Sat Nav's are very simple and how once she has this one sussed she wont have a problem using the one the rental car company gives her for her trip to Italy.... to which mum says ..."Oh no, I'm going to take my own, I wont be able to understand what the woman is saying in Italian"...

Anyways, enough laughing at mums expense. Here are some of the latest house pictures of my builder getting ready to pour the second storey slab!

Layouts That Work

Do you ever see a picture and think - wow that layout just works.

This house I really adore - the layout is elegant and yet so simple and I think I can use this in my house down near the dining room. I love how the hall table and lamps backing onto the lounge just divides the space beautifully.

I love how the feature wallpaper and wall lights just give you this love punch of texture and contrast.

Oh and I love love love the doorway and yes I do realise - that door is totally, completely impossible but still, a gal can dream cant she?

Anyways, so I love the layout and am thinking this will work very well in mine and I cant wait to finally get started on some actual work. Hubby and I almost died when we both agreed that although the whole "doing everything ourselves" almost kills us, the sitting back and waiting is much much worse. I would much rather be tiling or getting grubby in the garden than sitting and waiting for something to happen.

Obviously nothing much is happening on my house at the moment, oh yes, delays are killing me! Just killing me! However hopefully soon I will have my second storey slab poured.

My fingers are cramping from being crossed for so many weeks but I'm determined to remain positive!

The Blind Side

Has anyone seen the blind Side? The movie - because I tell you I fell truely madly deeply in love with her house...
Total and complete heaven.... I am almost tempted to move to the good old US of A just for this?